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"I’ve been learning over and over that unless someone is willing to see the unwieldy plank in their own eye, it’s absolutely impossible to help them out of their destructive patterns and self-deception.You can yell and grieve and make a scene. You can spend hours in gentle counsel and eloquent exchange and loud weeping and tongue-biting patience. But unless that person wants to change, it’s not happening. No argument or mercy or fervency is enough. They’ll need to be pierced by their own convictions, or in the worst case, they must come to their own ruin and see the miles of hurt they’ve caused. Otherwise, you’re only reinforcing their pride and building their defenses and rationalizations. Often the only thing we can do is to pray and humble ourselves. To look at our own plank first. To expect the best, even if the other person is taking no strides. To keep the door open. To keep serving. And maybe it’s not about the other person anyway. If they don’t change, you will."— J.S. Park

Holly Stratton wrote a post on lifehurts.us .  She talked about how we protect our hearts and build walls because of how much we fear vulnerability.  I couldn't resist sharing it with all of you and I highly encourage you to click the link above and read her post!

Hope you are all enjoying your September!

A Glimpse Into My Journal...

Hello All!

I was writing in my prayer journal this morning and the Lord just impressed upon my heart to share what He has been teaching me.  I'm so thankful for Shannon and Abigail (fellow bloggers) and the way they have always been open with their readers and talked about the things they struggle with.  That is a gift to be able to do that and one that I have been trying to cultivate in my life.   So I'm just throwing a "thank you" out there to the two of them!  They have been an encouragement and blessing in my life because of their openness with their readers!

I can't say that I like to admit to failures in my life...yes I have a lot of them and will willingly admit to my physical failures, but the nitty gritty ones about how I view myself or my fears (about so many things) are not usually out there for people to see.  I only allow people so far and then (imagine whatever sound you want that brings forward images of a brick wall being built) a wall comes up.  Yeah, I don't like to be vulnerable, open and yet I know that is what God is calling me to do.  How can we minister to the hearts of other people and expect them to open up to us, if we never allow them to see within us?

I sat down and started thanking God for the ways he has worked in my life over the last year. I thanked Him for the many, uncountable times He has helped me through a situation (oh, if only I had asked for help from Him sooner, rather then later), opened my eyes to the spiritual battle that is swirling around us and my need to renounce Satan through Christ's power.  He has taught me so many things in the past 12 months that in many ways I am a very different person from who I was 1 year ago.

I thanked Him for the little things that were making me smile as I continued to write..things like warm, sunny rays that warmed me on the outside but that seemed to continue right through and touch my heart.  Things like my sister's dog, curling up against my legs as I got some extra sleep this morning...Things like genuine laughter with friends & family.... I thanked Him for mentors and the people in my life who truly want the best for me and have taught me so much...people who have made me feel safe enough to open up to them, people who I know love me for who I am - with all my faults - and accept me where I am at.  No judgment, because they know that we are all on a journey and none of us are perfect.

Can you tell I started getting deeper in my conversation as I went along? :)

I thanked Him for specific people like, Eric Ludy, Adrianne & John Shales, Paul & Jenny Speed (All people who I have impacted my life through their messages)...People who open up their hearts and lives to Christ, fully surrendered, OPEN about their sin, BROKEN over it and living in FREEDOM.  They trust Him with their future, past, dreams, failures, heartaches, joys...life...and then are vulnerable and humble enough to stand before other people and share their stories!

I thought of one of my instructors and how he can stand before our class and pretty much say "this is who I am, take me or leave me."  If someone doesn't like him, then it is their loss, he knows who and what he is and is comfortable with it - His confidence isn't shaken if someone doesn't like or approve of him.

It hit me...How much more should I, who know God as my Savior, Creator, Commander & Guide be unmovable in my beliefs and not care what others think of me, because I know who I am in Christ.  I know what the end goal of my life is.  I have the most powerful battle partner on my side and I know who will win the battle in the end.

So...

Why do I fear rejection, persecution, judgment & criticism?  Why do I hate the thought of being

unaccepted and different?  Because my focus is on the world and it's expectations and not on HIS!

God chose me before the foundations of the world were formed.   He loved me, accepted me, forgave me so much that He killed His Son that I might spend eternity with Him.  I need only to ask Him for help, strength, courage, you name it, and He is there, helping me conquer the lies and fears Satan is hurling at me.

I know that my confidence, courage, peace, joy, strength and validation should all come from HIM ALONE!   Not my abilities, not others words or treatment of me, but the knowledge of all the truths listed above should keep me in perfect peace.

"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee; because he trusteth in thee."  Isaiah 26:3

"Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid: for the Lord JEHOVAH is my strength and my song; he also is become my salvation."  Isaiah 12:2

One of the biggest lessons I'm learning, is to being ok with who and how God has made me.  It is so easy to get caught up in what other Christians expect of me, what the world expects of me, even what my family expects of me and try to fulfill those expectations allowing those people to validate me in stead of my Heavenly Father...  I realize that my focus needs to wholly on Him, my reasons for doing something must be for Him and the way I do those things must be for Him.


These were just some of my thoughts this morning!  May God Bless All of You!

Releasing The Bottle

I started this post about a month ago... things got busy though and I forgot to post it...however, I wanted to leave that beautiful picture of what New England starts to look like at the beginning of October...just a week or two before peak foliage :)



It is that beautiful time here again in New England!!  The fall foliage is starting to burst out in crimson reds and golden hues of yellow and orange! "sigh"  I totally understand why we have "leaf peepers" (tourists that come for drives just to see the fall foliage) in our state!!

On another note though...

I joined my friend a few days ago on a trip to Boston to complete an event on her "24 List".  She turned 24 a week ago and has made a list of 24 things she wants to do while she is 24.  This dear friend has fought cancer over the last two years and finally won.  Over the past few months I have seen her return back to the girl I remembered and knew was still in their somewhere :)  She wants to live life to the fullest and cherish every moment!  Therefore, the list of 24 things she wants to experience this year is a list of sentimental, fun and adventurous things to do or opportunities to learn and stretch her creativity!  This trip to Boston included writing a message, putting it into a glass bottle and sending it out into the unknown.  Hoping, praying, wishing that someday, someone will find it and it will impact their lives....

"Why Suffer?": A Friend's Post

As I was reading through a friends blog, I came across her most recent article.  I asked her if I could share part of it here with you and then put a link for all of you to follow to her blog...  It was very perceptive and made me sit back and think and ask myself some questions... What do I hide from? Avoid? Remove myself from? Am I willing to accept what God has allowed into my life in order that He might be glorified?   Am I willing to live out the verse, "in my weakness, he is made strong."?

"Why suffer? Many have been asking this question since Brittany Maynard asked herself this question and sparked national news and controversy over the last few weeks.
I was saddened to read of Brittany Maynard’s death this weekend. After a diagnosis of terminal brain cancer, Brittany decided to end her own life instead of suffering through the last stages of the cancer. She was only 29. People all over the country have applauded her bravery and her choice to “die with dignity.”
I’m not writing this to condemn Brittany. I’m human too. I’d much rather avoid suffering if it was in my power to do so. I would also be desperate for some measure of control. As much as the thought of dying scares me, I’d rather it be quick than drawn out and painful. I can understand some of Brittany’s reasons for her decision. But there is a much deeper issue beneath Brittany’s desire to end her suffering."

Click here to read the rest of her post...

One Person At A Time..

"Sometimes working in a third world country makes me feel like I am emptying the ocean with an eyedropper.'  Today it often still feels that way.  I have learned to be okay with this feeling because I have learned that I will not change the world.  Jesus will do that.  I can, however, change the world for one person...and if one person sees the love of Christ in me, it is worth every minute." 1. 

That quote was from Katie Davis' book "Kisses from Katie".  A book that from the first read has landed among my most favorite books.  I am going through it again for the second time and this entry from her journal really hit home for me.

Tempted to fear?

      "Women are always tempted to be initiators.  We like to get things done.  We want to talk about situations and feelings, get it all out in the open, deal with it.  It appears to us that men often ignore and evade issues, sweep things under the rug, forget about them, get on with projects, business, pleasures, sports, eat a big steak, turn on the television, roll over, and go to sleep.  Women respond to this tendency by insisting on confrontation, communication, showdown.  If we can't dragoon our men into that, we nag, we plead, we get attention by tears, silence, or withholding warmth and intimacy.  We have a large bag of tricks.

     C.S. Lewis's vision of purgatory was a place where milk was always boiling over, crockery smashing and toast burning.  The lesson assigned to the men was to do something about it.  The lesson for the women was to do nothing.  That would be purgatory for most of us."1.


Found on Pinterest

     I read this quote a few days ago and it has been burned in my memory since then.  I know in my own life, most of what this quote says rang true.  I want to communicate when something is wrong.  I want to fix the situation.  I want to fix every one's problems...and when certain people whether they be male or female, seem to ignore or evade or even seem to forget, (get ready for this, since I'm sure I am the only one that does this)  I either give the silent treatment or get confrontational....yep, I am no saint.  This is an area that God has really been working on my heart lately. 

Yes, I believe it is good to communicate, but so often what is spurring me on?  Is it fear or rational thinking that causes me to lose my control and demand communication?  I think we all know that a LOT of the time it is fear.  Fear of something getting out of control.  Fear of what others will think.  Fear that it is not moving quick enough.  Fear that something will go wrong if it is not taken care of.